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Honesty: the Secret to Homeschooling and Parenting Success
© Beverley Paine A friend recently wanted to know why I had such nice children - which is the generally accepted view around here! I had no ready answer other than I thought it had something to do with homeschooling, which is true. However, not all homeschooling children are so nice, or so caring towards their parents and their siblings, the environment, etc.... so it had to be something else. Honesty has always been big in my life, but I never really consciously knew it until this year. I used to fight hard against hypocrisy, as it was rather prevalent at home during my childhood. It's hard to recognise one's own hypocrisy: I found I had to be scrupulously honest and very critical with and of myself to reveal it. This is a major focus of my life, and one of the goals underpinning the home education of the children. From the start I made sure that I told the kids as much as I could about how I felt, what I believed, and pointed out that there are other ways of being that are just as valid as mine. Tolerance seemed to me to be important in the development of honesty. I tried as best as I could not to lie to the kids, to myself or to others. I tried not to 'hide' anything from them, except surprise presents, of course! If I talked about my children, and I do that all the time, the children know about it and what I say, etc. We didn't lie to control their behaviour. If we didn't want them to do something we said so - "I don't want you to do that because it (worries, frightens, annoys...) me, or will endanger yourself or others. Then we might talk about it. Often the children would accept my 'ruling' without explanation, far too busy to stop and listen, and confident in my judgement. I know that's because we'd been careful to trust and respect each other, both dependent on honesty! Over the years I've found that talking to others honestly about how I live, how I feel, how things are like at home, now and in my past, has given them the confidence to talk about themselves. I would never have found out that most of us share the same worries, concerns and fears and that a problem shared is a problem half-solved, if I hadn't been so honest and revealing in the first place. I've made so many wonderful friends I can rely on for support during any kind of crisis, or for simply having a great time together. Life's too short to miss out on that! This article also appears in the Family Times magazine Winter 2008 issue for home educating families.
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education in Australia. State and Territory governments are responsible for regulating home education and have different requirements, however home educating families are able to develop curriculum and learning programs to suit the individual needs of their children.
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Pioneering members of the home education movement in Australia, Beverley and Robin Paine are passionate advocates of true educational choice for families. They began homeschooling their children in 1986 and three years later started the South Australian Home Based Learners network.
Beverley wrote Getting Started with Homeschooling in 1995-97 and since then continues to write books and booklets on home education. She balances spending time helping home educators with working in her garden and renovating her home, as well as continuing to build her collection of writing on a variety of homeschooling subjects. Beverley maintains an extensive collection of websites as well as several Yahoo groups supporting families teaching their children at home.
In 2007 Beverley joined the HEA and was a committee member for three years during which time she edited and produced the HEA Newsletter, Stepping Stones for Home Educators magazine, annual Resource Directory and other HEA publications.
If you'd like to keep in touch with what Beverley is up to her in her life, sign up for the Homeschool Australia Newsletter or visit her Homeschool Australia Facebook page.nor do they endorse or recommend products (other than their own) listed in contributed articles, pages, or advertisements.